GOD MADE PLANTS FOR US TO CONSUME
 
GOD MADE PLANTS FOR US TO CONSUME
 
NOTE: This is my personal religious belief. It is based on an excerpt from the Holy Bible, and in no way promotes illegal activities. It simply suggests that we make them legal. In the end, God is the ultimate judge of whether our laws are truly legitimate.


The Creation:

In the beginning, there wasn't jack shit. So God decided to change that, and said, "Let there be light". Thus, the first cigarette lighter was born. God didn't have anywhere to sit and smoke though, so on the second day, God created land and water. He realized that sitting on the water was uncomfortable because it got his asscrack wet, and he hadn't invented pants yet, so he sat on the dry land. Soon, however, God realized that he had nothing to smoke. So on third day, he fixed that. God made lots of plants bearing seeds and herb. He picked off a pretty leaf with seven points, and rolled it up into a doobie. He decided to call his new invention "herb", because of where it came from. He grew so much of it that he called it a weed. Thus, the first weed was born. On the fourth day, at approximately 4:20 PM, after God finished smoking his weed, he made the months and years. And thus he declared it worldwide weedsmoking day on the twentieth day, the fourth month of every year, at exactly 4:20 PM. He made the sun and the moon, smoked another fatty, and made a bunch of little stars too. They really tripped him out and were cool to look at while he smoked his magical herb. On the fifth day, God created a bunch of animals, namely cats and dogs, to set fire to while high and watch them chase their tails. God got a good laugh over this, but he needed someone to share the excitement with him, so on the sixth day, he made people. He taught these people such things as how to grow weed indoors, and how it isn't a crime if you don't inhale. Only God can inhale. So the people went forth unto the green herb-covered land, and sread their message to all the people. Some descendants of these prophets today have included George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Bill Clinton, and Jerry Garcia. The only living prophet is Bill Clinton, still smoking that herb...(it makes ya wonder what was actually in the cigar). On the seventh day, God sat back with his friends and got high. Then, after he munched on some bread and wine, he rested. Therefore, I say to you, friends, spread God's word unto the lands. Let's Re-Legalize The green herbs, as they are all God's plants, and we are all God's people. Amen.
 
 
 
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